A scare and a heartbeat

On Thursday night I had a bleeding scare.  Brown blood mixed with mucus.  Friday morning we called the doctor and gave them some information.  No, no fever, no intercourse, no chills, yes lower back pain, no abdominal cramps…  They said bedrest (which I know doesn’t work first trimester, but we don’t live in a city) and go to the emergency room if the blood turns red or cramps start.  We asked… should we get a baseline beta (blood test)?  They said sure, why not.

To make a long story short, the bleeding stopped on Sunday and we spent the next few days playing phone tag and finally gave up and changed doctors.  My previous doctor is good, and actually delivered DC as the backup for the amazing OB/GYN who moved to Australia… but it is impossible to get an appointment in her office less than a month in advance, and it is difficult to get in touch with her nurse.  The new doctor recently moved to the area and was able to fit us in in a day’s notice.

So, while waiting to hear back from the nurse about the second beta (if they go down => miscarriage… if they go up… that may be ok or may just be the placenta making hormones), we went to the new doctor and did an ultrasound.  This one was abdominal rather than transvaginal, but the baby and heartbeat showed up just the same.  I cried.  She was also able to give us our beta results since she’s in the same hospital system as our other doctor.  Heartbeat is healthy.  Growth exactly on track.  Everything is fine.  Six days of tension and fear melted away.

Now, the new doctor said some things that aren’t factually correct.  I mentioned my PCOS.  She said, very confidently, there’s no difference in miscarriage rates between PCOS women and normal women.  Maybe I should have contradicted her, but I didn’t say anything given it was our first meeting.  But, if there’s no difference then why the heck am I on 1500mg metformin?  I’m pretty darn sure the only reason I put up with it is because 1500mg metformin has been shown to lower the chance of miscarriage for women with PCOS to that of normal women in the first trimester.  My previous doctor said new research has come out in the past 5 years suggesting I should stay on it for the duration of the pregnancy because even though it doesn’t change chance of miscarriage or stillbirth past first trimester it has been shown to improve other outcomes.

But I can see the new doctor if I have sudden bleeding, and I have to wait up to 4 weeks to see the previous doctor.

The problem is if I have other issues that are beyond her area of expertise.  These days it really seems like you have to become an expert on whatever problems you have.  We do so much asking and suggesting to the doctors based on empirical research and what other women’s doctors in larger cities who really are experts suggest to their patients.  I wish I could have an OB/GYN who is as awesome as DC’s pediatrician.  When we went in to the pedi with a problem we hadn’t the slightest clue about, he was able to look at DC, ask a couple questions, do a couple of tests, diagnose the problem (“Nursemaid’s elbow”), fix it, then explain how to avoid it or fix it ourselves.  If something like that happens to me… I’m just up excrement creek.  As long as things I can Google happen I’m fine, but once I’m out of my league, I really wish I were living in a city.

But the baby is alive.  And for now that’s what is important.  Hopefully there won’t be any more bleeding scares.

And now I can get back to work… there’s a lot of stuff I didn’t do in the past week that really needs to get done.  But it’s much easier to do without that overwhelming worry.

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54 Responses to “A scare and a heartbeat”

  1. feMOMhist Says:

    virtual hug. I bled constantly through first trimester of both pregnancies due to congenital uterine malformation and I know how terrifying it can be. Medline was like my best friend/worst enemy. Sending sticky sticky thoughts your way

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      I’m glad they turned out well! I didn’t have any bleeding with DC, and the bleeding was different with my first m/c. And it seems like everybody around is having missed miscarriages. The internet kept telling me 50/50 chance. Could be nothing, could be something awful.

  2. First gen american Says:

    So relieved….now imagine that happening on dec26th and everyone being on vacation because it was the holidays….that was what happened to me, but unfortunately my incident did not have a happy ending. Well not until 1.5 years later.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      Sorry for your loss.

      We could have gone to the emergency room (which is what the first doctors office said to do if the bleeding or cramps got worse)… but the price difference was on the order of $1500. Since they can’t actually *do* anything for a first trimester miscarriage, we decided to live with the uncertainty and then change doctors when it got to be too much.

      My first miscarriage was a lot more obvious– bright red blood, heavy bleeding. And I was still seeing an RE so was able to get in right away for an u/s.

  3. Alyssa Says:

    I’m so glad that the beta levels checked out, growth is on track, and you saw the heartbeat. Nothing is scarier than seeing blood in the 1T (or any trimester, really). I also suffered a m/c (at 8.5 weeks) just before Christmas two years ago, and I remember the heart-sinking, stomach-twisting feeling when I first saw blood.

    Sending you lots of sticky vibes and virtual hugs – how long until you’re in the 2T?

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      Sorry for your loss. :(

      It’ll be about a month. At that point I’ll let my chair know so we can negotiate a course reduction. (Since Poli Sci has recently had babies and they did a one course reduction…)

  4. Zenmoo Says:

    Hugs – I know what it’s like – both the fear & relief. I’ve had 2 natural miscarriages, 1 healthy baby (with first tri bleeding) and am going in for a d&c tomorrow morning because PG #4 has ended in a missed miscarriage. It sucks – the fear really fucks with you. But seeing that heartbeat for the first time – that is sweet.

    I’m interested in yours & the Dr’s comments about PCOS & miscarriage. After 3, I think it probably is time to investigate a bit further than ‘bad luck’ – can you suggest any good
    resources? Very medically oriented (published in reputable journal) is better as I’ve got a medical husband to convince too.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      I really wanted to comment on your blog the other day but I just couldn’t. I’m so so sorry.

      Off the top of my head I don’t have sources. However, there was a large randomized trial done several years ago that you should be able to find on PubMed. I read a fantastic book on PCOS that had just came out 6 or so years ago when I was first ttc that had all the research summarized and links, but I can’t figure out which one it was or if it is still in print (it had a pink cover, but you can imagine that doesn’t help). IIRC it was written after a big conference in which all the main people in the field standardized the definition of PCOS and made guidelines for how to detect it. Since then, there’s been a whirlwind of research– it was really heating up when I was pregnant with DC. So much so that metformin in the first trimester is standard rather than “we’re not sure if the benefits outweigh the risks yet, but it’s suggestive.” So my first suggestion would be to hit up PubMed. When I was trying to decide whether to stay on 1000mil or ramp up to 1500mil this time (I’m small and it seemed to be working), I could only find articles testing 1500mil, so I decided to go with that even though 1000mil is probably fine for me. I did ask for my B12 levels to be checked but haven’t gotten that info back yet.

      It doesn’t sound like you have a luteal phase defect (those miscarriages are early and don’t result in missed miscarriages), so progesterone supplements won’t help.

      Another potential cause of miscarriage is poor egg quality, so they may suggest Clomid even if you ovulate on your own. If you do this, make sure you do it monitored so they can see the eggs actually come out, both so you get the timing right and to ensure you don’t have multiples. Australia is probably better about that than the Southern US though.

      That’s about it for my knowledge of early miscarriages. I know quite a bit about incompetent cervixes for later miscarriages and premature labor. You learn a lot about these things on infertility forums.

      You should probably start seeing a specialist now. I really like Reproductive Endocrinologists for these issues, but I know some people who have had luck with high-risk OB/GYN.

    • Perpetua Says:

      I’m not a doctor and do not play one on tv, but I had a friend with two late 1T miscarriages, and it turned out she had a folic acid absorption problem. She took megadoses of folic acid for #4 and it turned out well. I mention this only because, as nicoleandmaggie have said above, you basically have to be your own doctor, and this might be something easy to test for. (Although I don’t know the diagnostic process in my friend’s case – a blood test? A wild guess? I assume the former but can’t swear to it.)

      I too know the gut wrenching feeling of those spots of blood. It is so hard.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        Another thing they test is Thyroid. A simple blood test and another thing easily treated with medication.

        If you haven’t had a standard “fertility work-up”, you may want to have one after your HCG levels go back to zero. That’ll test for PCOS (one of the three indicators– you need two for a syndrome diagnosis), Thyroid, POF… and possibly some other things.

      • bogart Says:

        Thyroid is huge, and anyone wanting to email me for tediously detailed information on the topic is welcome to hit the Grumpies up for my email (which they are, by extension, welcome to pass along). It’s also usually easily, safely, and cheapable treatable, and doing so improves both maternal health and fetal development — hard to beat. Other possible (testable and often treatable) problems include clotting disorders and celiac disease.

        For those trying to evaluate the safety of taking many different sorts of medication while ttc and/or pregnant, this is a very useful page, and I’m told (though I have not tested this) that they have actual experts who are willing to communicate with actual humans via phone and/or email — http://www.motherisk.org/women/index.jsp .

  5. Dana Says:

    Another website I found helpful for those who like published studies to back up decision making during pregnancy was http://www.otispregnancy.org It has fact sheets, including one for metformin, that pull together FAQ with references for many drugs and conditions. I very much agree that you have to be your own specialist these days! Also argh for all the worrying that seems to be involved in pregnancy, somehow I never anticipated that.

  6. Cloud Says:

    I’m so glad everything is OK.

    I spotted quite a bit in my first trimester with both kids, but since I had no history of miscarriage it was mostly just shrugged off. It made me so nervous, so I can only imagine how it would make you feel. I’m sending big virtual hugs and hoping for no more scares for you!

  7. bogart Says:

    Ay, yi, yi, yi, yi, I’m so sorry you have been having to endure all this. Not as sorry as I am relieved that all seems well (and as I’m sure you are *well* aware, the many positive data points you have — beta, hearbeat, and so forth all put you in very likely very positive territory), but still.

    When I finally got pregnant after IVF #4 (+, depending how you count — 6 if you count FETs, more than that if you count canceled cycles, so let’s just say I wasn’t the picture of tranquil bliss, nor of un-informedness), I went to the very good midwifery practice associated with our local (er, big, serious) hospital. That was generally wonderful, but the “main” midwife assured me that now that I was pregnant my prospects were the same as anyone else’s (my age) for having a healthy baby. Um, no, no, they’re not (and we don’t even really know why). In fact (thank heavens), I personally did, and had an uneventful pregnancy as well, but in retrospect I wish I had challenged her on her claim — my failing to do so left me perpetually uncomfortable, not knowing if she (a) just didn’t know or (b) wanted to reassure me. It was probably (a), but if it was (b), it failed miserably for the reason noted.

    All of which is to say, were I you I think I’d bring your concerns up with your new doctor (based on my own hindsight), though of course YMMV.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      Yeah. DH said, “it wasn’t like she was trying to cancel your prescription to metformin.” If she had, then I would have fought. It’s hard when you’re meeting someone for the first time to be anything other than polite, or maybe that’s just Midwesterners.

  8. RC Says:

    Metformin is mg not ml, just FYI.

  9. Linda Says:

    I can’t empathize with your situation since I’ve never been in it or close to it, so I won’t try. I’m glad that it was just a scare and that you’re getting the support you need.

    “These days it really seems like you have to become an expert on whatever problems you have.” Yeah. I’ve commented before about suffering through the disintegration of my health due to an untreated thyroid condition and how it took years to find a doctor that would really listen to me, help me identify the problem, and treat me. I live in fear of losing this doc to retirement. Really.

  10. Dr. O Says:

    I’m so glad you saw the heartbeat, and all else looks normal.

    I was an absolute wreck during my 1st trimester – really throughout the entire pregnancy. I cramped quite a bit and felt a LOT of pulling, and every tinge sent me into a panic attack. One of the docs at my practice was always very taken aback when I mentioned the cramping, which made me even more worried. I always loved hearing the sound of that little heartbeat when the stress got to be too much. If it had been up to me, I would have been there every morning during the first trimester, just to hear that sound so that I could go along with the rest of my day.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      That sounds so scary! Thank goodness it turned out so well.

    • bogart Says:

      I bought a doppler and used it daily (not an exaggeration), but it wouldn’t have helped the Grumpy One at this early stage. It was probably a weird thing to do, but I did find hearing that sound both magical and reassuring.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        I’m afraid I’d freak out being unable to find the hb!

        Later on my magic trick was drinking cold OJ to make DC kick.

      • bogart Says:

        Yes, that certainly would have freaked me out — I started later and got lucky in terms of always being able to find that thumping sound (versus having it disappear despite being well as I know can happen). It’s definitely one of those YMMV things just in terms of whether it’s a good idea and whether it works (obviously those are related but not perfectly).

  11. virgo Says:

    a big shout out to those heartbeats!

  12. oilandgarlic Says:

    So glad that you and baby are fine. I experienced heavy bleeding around week 7 or 8 and was put on bedrest as a precaution, although the ob/gyn basically told me “let nature take its course”. He was a nice man actually but honest.

    I did a lot of reading about early miscarriage. It could be a sign of genetic abnormality in the fetus but there are really so many possibilities and uncertainties, and scientific explanations really can’t make anyone feel better if it occurs.

    Best of luck to you!

  13. MutantSupermodel Says:

    Whew I am SO glad everything’s ok. I can’t even imagine the relief.

  14. bardiac Says:

    I’m glad things are okay, and hope you don’t have any further worries. Take care. (and I don’ t mean that in an oppressive way, but in a friendly way, if that makes sense.)

  15. Comrade PhysioProf Says:

    I can’t possibly imagine how frightening that must have been, and I am so glad everything is ok!

  16. Pamela Says:

    I’m so glad to hear this turned out okay!

  17. Molly (Mike and Molly's House) Says:

    Smart changing doctors. I miscarried 3 times before having my daughter (there’s a history of miscarriages in my family). I could write a book on the misinformation and stupid things doctors told me along the way.
    The doctor that delivered my daughter said one of the smartest things-’In medicine we might understand about 10% of the science, and that’s a big might’.
    Good thoughts are going out to you from Mike and I!!

  18. Zenmoo Says:

    @nicoleandmaggie – re: the not commenting – I understand. I couldn’t comment on your initial post either. I was too scared for myself – but it was actually a really helpful thing to read. So thank you for putting it out there. It helps.

    And thanks to you & the other commenters for the resource suggestions. I think I’ll get through Christmas and then enjoy a boat load of raw fish & Japanese beer at Nobu for our wedding anniversary in January and then ‘get back on the horse’ so to speak.

    I’ll be hoping for the best for you for the next 30+ weeks.

  19. Zenmoo Says:

    Oh & @Molly – word on medicine being about 10% knowledge and 90% best guess. A lot of my reluctance to investigate derived from that. I know it’s quite possible they’ll come up with a “we don’t know.” And frankly, I’m an engineer. I like solvable problems.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      Earlier yesterday I was talking to #2 about engineering jobs and I accidentally typed “engineering ob” and I thought… how AWESOME would that be?

    • bogart Says:

      *YES*. It drives me nuts how often what “we practice evidence-based medicine” means is, “No one’s yet proved that we are doing this wrong.” Also, the way that privileges whatever gets specified as the null hypothesis.

      • Rumpus Says:

        The human body is so incredibly complicated. It’s a giant, interconnected, electrical-chemical-thermal-mechanical time-varying system, at the least. In addition, each person’s body develops differently. On top of that, we throw bio-chemicals at it to try and get it to do what we want it to do, and there’s a huge number of those we’ve found or created, many of which can interact. It would be nice if the medical sciences were more advanced…but I’m just glad we’ve gotten as far as we have.

        My real concern is that even if the research is convinced of one thing, that doesn’t mean 90% of healthcare practitioners aren’t following what they learned decades ago in school.

      • bogart Says:

        Yes, that 90% concern is probably the more appropriate one (see NicoleandMaggie below and wonder if even 90% is enough, or, more to the point, if they’re even following *that*). And, right, I get it, I mean, it’s not anybody’s “fault” that we don’t know more — I just wish we could be better about admitting it. Between personal, family, and animal care I’ve had plenty of experience in recent years with medical practice and let’s just say I’m always reminded of the old (original) StarTrek’s where Jim and Bones would end up with someone in the 20th century who needed medical care and Bones would be shaking his head and saying, “So primitive.” It often (still) is. And I’m OK with that but wish we could admit it.

  20. rented life Says:

    Late to the post, but I did read it yesterday. Super happy about hearbeats! My cousin’s wife had many problems concieving and when the IVF finally took, we celebrated every little milestone.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      …and today they called in to say hey, we were supposed to give you a rho-gam. Oops. I should have thought to ask about it at our u/s appointment. I knew I was supposed to get one within 96 hours of a miscarriage but didn’t know I should get one for bleeding too. That window has passed, but I’m going in today anyway.

      Of course, my fancy RE office in big important city completely and totally forgot to give a rho-gam with my first miscarriage. Luckily my blood hadn’t sensitized.

      Negative blood type isn’t *that* unusual.

      • bogart Says:

        Aieee! Good grief. Sorry you are dealing with this but hope/trust all will be OK — further evidence, though, of the importance of staying on top of your own care.

  21. Funny about Money Says:

    How agonizing! Sorry to hear you’re having to go through all this worry and fear. Glad the baby is OK for the nonce and hope the rest of the pregnancy proceeds uneventfully.


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