Quality ranting in today’s instant-messaging:
I should probably not talk to people while I am cutting back on caffeine for the summer. Also it’s possible I shouldn’t make a major life decision while pissed off about travel and things.
#2: why are you pissed off about travel?
#1: because it sucks ass to get to and from Blighted Town. It’s super-expensive and massively inconvenient. Also I maybe shouldn’t make a major decision while detoxing off caffeine. did I mention we went to another wedding this weekend
#2: ick, caffeine detox
no wonder you haven’t been up
#1: my favorite person in the dept is leaving here because her hubby can’t get a job here. and I feel like the seniors in the dept hate me and they’re not retiring
#2: nobody could hate you
#1: wrong. they are crazy mad insane people and they hate me because of no reason. But they do.
if they have bitch faces, they must also have bitch sentences.
#1: sorry, I’m really really ragey right now due to my mom’s IMing me in the other window about how people screw her over and SHE LETS THEM
#2: my mom is IMing me about how she’s almost done with her revision for a book chapter. She’s working on the citations
#1: see, my mom is IMing me about how her male authors don’t do the revisions on the book chapters, so she has to, because her boss accepts sub-par work from authors. my mom does the citations for men. Because her boss lets it be that way.
my mom, BTW, is not a secretary.
#2: My mom used to be more of a pushover, but since they were assholes when she got breast cancer, she’s gotten less doormatty.
#1: I don’t understand why I have to produce publishable work in order to get published, but other people don’t!
#2: Because you’re a young woman?
#1: other people get my mom to fix it for them!
#2: It isn’t fair. Though I bet you could get your mom to fix things for you.
#1: my mom wouldn’t fix MY papers when I was a KID IN SCHOOL! she made me do it myself! she did proofread part of my dissertation, but she damn sure didn’t do the citations for me.
#2: obviously she’s only a doormat for men.
hm, your mom is part of the patriarchy?
#1: patriarchy combined with lack of caffeine makes me extra-ragey.
#2: Perhaps I’m being too mean. [#1 doesn't think so] But seriously, I’m glad my mom isn’t a doormat anymore.
#1: mostly, my mom’s BOSS is patriarchy. My mom knows this is wack but refuses to change. She is patriarchy too, but less so. I wish my mom would quit being so patriarchy. She raised us to do better than that.
#2: you should tell her that.
#1: WTF second-wave feminists who taught me that I’m as good as a man but apparently don’t actually live that.
#2: “Mom, I’m sorry to have to say this, but you’re setting a bad example.”
#1: I’ve tried. but she also has low self-confidence about her awesome skills and ability to get a different job if this one lets her go. Which if they have any brains they won’t because she works like a workhorse and for cheap.
but I suppose it provides health insurance
#1: how the F*CK can we make OTHER people pay us what we’re WORTH when some people think it’s totally ok for a woman to get treated like a doormat? As long as there are some doormats, the rest of us get trampled too.
#2: it is true. we get blowback for not being not doormats
#1: IT’S PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT MAKE MY STUDENT EVALS GO DOWN
#2: exactly! My mom says she wishes your mom were her editor.
#1: my mom doesn’t seem to understand why I’m so mad about her job. It’s because she’s teaching men that a woman will do their work for them, and then I have to deal with the little shits in my classroom.
#1: I told her that but she doesn’t believe it’s anyone’s fault but their parents. HELLO you are a parent too.
#2: My mother agrees with you. I’m sorry that your mom is a tool for the Man.
#1: maybe your mom and my mom should swap jobs for a week. My mom can write things. Your mom can be an editor that’s not a doormat.
#2: She wouldn’t though.
#1: the pay isn’t good enough!
p.s. Sorry Mom, I know that patriarchy is a system, not just you. There are many systematic forces going on here. I love you even though you annoy me.
Grumpy Readers, Does it bother you when other people are used by the system (and have given up on trying to stop being used)? Does it matter if the person is a loved one?