If only Google could show me the way (or at least point me to grumpy rumblings!)

Q:  my marriage is becoming shit, how do i not wallow in misery?

A.  Seek counseling, possibly a divorce, and possibly medication.

Q:  should you only go into academia if you are independently wealthy

A:  No.  One could also be very frugal.  Or in a field that pays well.  Or you could have really low expectations!

Q:  when should an untenured high school teacher have a baby

A:  whenever ze is ready

Q:  can a person have a phd in accounting?

A:  Yes

Q:  what is the salary of an accountant with phd

A:  http://www1.salary.com/Professor-Accounting-Salary.html says the median salary is ~109K for accounting professors.  We can’t vouch for its accuracy.  Presumably those in the private sector make more.

Q:  what you advise people if it was your last day

A:  It is really tempting to tell people what you really think of them… don’t.  If you can possibly help it.

Q:  can the government take your home when you die even if you have a will

A:  We Are Not A Lawyer.  Consult one.  But, probably not.  It depends what you mean by “the government” (see eminent domain, etc.).  If it’s not paid off, the bank can certainly take it!

Q:  how long does it take to furnish an apartment with a kitchen

A:  Anywhere from 1 hour at Ikea to 35 years (and counting).

Q:  what to do after mortgage is paid off

A:  Have a drink, celebrate, take a trip, bulk up your retirement accounts.  Buy a pony (warning:  your HOA may not approve the pony and may then take your house)?

Q:  when will i want baby #2

A:  Next Tuesday.  Or maybe never.  Is never good?

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16 Responses to “If only Google could show me the way (or at least point me to grumpy rumblings!)”

  1. Kellen Says:

    Also, at least in GA, you can go to the public university websites, find the names and titles of some professors, and then look them up here: http://www.open.georgia.gov/
    Assistant professor I looked up is making $207k, associate prof is making $211k (huh, wonder what the difference is?) Also – why am I not in the process of getting a PhD??

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      The difference is that the associate professor probably got a raise at promotion, but was hired at a lower salary and hasn’t been getting COL raises. I actually got my salary bumped up at promotion so I’m making exactly what my newly hired assistant colleague is.

      Or more realistically with salaries in the 200K range, they just got slightly different outside offers.

  2. Debbie M Says:

    Ugh, salaries. I still compare mine to those of starting teachers in my area–and not always favorably. (I’m not faculty, but a clerical/admin worker in higher ed; when I was a Senior Administrative Associate, I finally made more than first-year public school teachers. Most years.)

    I’m sad to hear that new faculty still start off making more than old-timers. Though I did have one old-timer tell me he wasn’t as good as the new people and that back in his day it was a lot easier to get a faculty job (only 2 other people had applied for his job), which was interesting. (He was already emeritus at that point which was probably 15 years ago now.)

    **

    As far as what to do on your last day (at a job), I do recommend telling people the good things you think about them. It’s fun.

    (I also had fun leaving out “illicit” snacks on a non-party day and e-mailing my co-workers that these snacks needed to be confiscated. I didn’t really have a problem with the one-party-per-month rule, but once I thought of the idea, I couldn’t resist it.)

    As for your last day (ever), maybe you could tell people off, but that’s still not a nice thing to do. I’d say make sure your will is in order, tell people you love them, and do some things you love with no regard for risk whatsoever (eating donuts, chewing on ice, hang gliding).

    **

    After the mortgage is paid off: start saving for your property taxes and contact your insurance company about billing you directly.

  3. delagar Says:

    I love these posts. And yes, yow, accounting professors make the bucks.

    Although lots of my students make larger starting salaries than I do.

    • delagar Says:

      …larger starting salaries than I make now after 26 years in the profession I mean. Writing is hard, especially on rum.


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