Dear Grumpy Readers…
I have always, always wanted to be a professor. I never trained for anything else, nor wanted to! But now… Please help me brainstorm about jobs out of academia that I might be able to do without wanting to die. Not in a cubicle. Not dependent on grant funding. Preferably with benefits. Any ideas? I don’t necessarily need health insurance (I could get on my partner’s, potentially), but I still need to fund my retirement and get sick days. I worked in a bank for a while and it was hellacious.
Sometimes I take career inventories or similar tests… they always come out “professor”. Always.
#2 suggests freelancing, and I think that’s probably the way to go. Not that that’s a steady income. Some quick googling turns up infinite scummy gross websites where “freelance” means “write your homework paper for you”
#2: Why don’t we ask the blog?
#1: we should, probably. Working 9-5, 5 days a week makes me want to DIE, as do cubicles. I know, because I tried it for a year [not the bank job, a different job]. In 12 months my body never got used to the morning schedule and I was never able to learn how to concentrate in a cube, headphones notwithstanding.
#1: their job market is bleaker than academia and I would need to get even more degrees… and lower paid, too. Also, “librarian” doesn’t mean “work with books”. It mostly means “deal with whiny patrons, or computer programming, or both”. I love books. I hate people.
#1: I could be a courtesan if I liked making small talk with strangers, which I don’t.
I really want nothing social. Preferably not working with people.
P.S. I have very few marketable skills and I want to sleep and read novels ALL THE TIME. I’m really bad at being a grownup. I think I might need a personality transplant.
#2: but really, soft money and a big emergency fund. Working part time, in SF.
#1: I really think that would give me ulcers, not knowing if I would have an income the next year or not. And my track record with getting grants is not great.
I dunno what to do with my life. if only this school weren’t so hideous, I really want to have tenure and be a faculty member and do research. But the teaching? I don’t know if I can do this for 40 more years.
#2: after tenure can you care less about teaching?
#1: yes, but I still have to do it. With how much I hate it, I wonder if it’s sustainable on my stress level. I probably just need therapy for the rest of my life in order to realize how to grow up and be an adult and do a job I don’t always love because that is adulthood.
#2: if it were fun they wouldn’t pay you to do it
and the question is– is there a job you hate equally that pays more!
#1: yeah, the problem is balancing the fact that I want money to live comfortably with the hatred of all work that feels like it is sucking out my soul but in reality nobody ever died from that.
My dream job is still academia. I just need to be at a different school. This is probably a separate post, but I’m feeling that I’m really not fitting in with the mission of this school and this college. I have workload issues and specific administrator issues. I feel like my scholarship isn’t respected here because it doesn’t fit with the mission. Further, the location depresses me.
So, readers… help! What should I do? Nothing in a cubicle, something that gives sick days, nothing with physical labor, I hate interacting with people, and I don’t know how to program. (I could learn, but it’s not worth it; I’m not patient nor interested enough.) Nothing that is teaching.
Ideally I want to have the same job at a better place, but those jobs seem impossible to come by. I did look, believe me I did. Last year there was 1 job in the country that I could have applied for, and it’s not worth moving for.