- EC update: At almost 15 mo, if the potty is in visual distance, DC2 will take hirself to the potty, sit down (the sitting down is what took the most effort– but ze finally no longer gets hir leg stuck in the potty while trying to sit), and pee and/or poo. If no potty is in sight, ze will just go wherever ze is. If the diaper is still on, ze will use the diaper while sitting in the potty.
- DC2’s diaper rash is SO BAD when hir diaper doesn’t get changed right away after a poo that ze got sent home on Friday because of it. Poor darling.
- When I mentioned to hir new daycare teacher that DC2 will go potty on the potty if they take hir, the teacher said very emphatically, “Not in THIS room. We do NOT do pottying in THIS room.”
- We’re counting the days until we can transfer DC2 to the Montessori that starts at 18 months. Ze has a slot reserved and everything.
- We miss the old daycare.
- It’s unlikely at this point that we will get any money back from our 4.5K prepayment from the old daycare.
- DC2 had been eating wheat and enjoying it, but we’ve stopped it again on the off chance that that is why ze is allergic to hir poo.
- DC2 seeks and destroys pens and pencils, breaking them into their component parts. Ze is very good at climbing and can get them wherever we hide them.
- At a party the other day, DC2 picked up a nerf gun that had 2 cartridges loaded and another next to it. Ze carefully removed the 2 cartridges, then loaded the gun with all 3. Upon learning that we did not teach hir how to do that, an adult nearby said we’d have to watch out for hir.
- One of my goals is to make sure that DC2 survives childhood.
October 29, 2013 at 5:04 am
So it’s fine for the toddlers in daycare to shit and piss their diapers in whatever room they’re in, which then the daycare staff have to change and clean the kidde up? But going in the f*cken potty, which is a lot cleaner and easier to deal with, is reserved for a special room?
October 29, 2013 at 5:50 am
October 29, 2013 at 7:17 am
We also feel terrible because ze cries every time we leave hir there in the morning. At the place that went out of business ze’d be all, “Bye, Mom, cya” or “Oh, were you leaving Dad, whatevs.” But the other good under-18 mo daycare we looked into was booked solid and the earliest Montessori is the 18 mo one, and ze isn’t 18 mo yet.
So this place is convenient– it’s at DC1’s school so it’s the same drop-off, but we really are counting the days until ze is 18 months so ze can switch schools to someplace ze’ll be happy to go to in the morning.
October 31, 2013 at 10:54 am
Can’t the new daycare see that your kid is doing what 18-month-olds already do and is qualified for that spot right now? Isn’t there a waiver for kids who are demonstrably 90+ days ahead of developmental schedule? gah!!
October 31, 2013 at 11:00 am
Well, DC2 (for the most part) can’t talk yet. (Ze is very easy to understand, however– perhaps ze does not need to talk so much to make hir demands known.) We may try to push a little earlier at the 18 month place when we get closer to the deadline and age. (I’m thinking about starting the transition with parent there at 17 months, in any case.) There are weird state legislation things about not having kids under and over certain ages in the same room at the same time though I don’t know exactly how they apply. And the potty trained thing is relatively new.
We did ask a month ago if they made exceptions and they said no, but I’m not sure how much DH pushed it. We were also told yesterday that one of the 3-year Montessoris isn’t really 3-year but is “potty trained”, but we’re betting it’s really “potty trained and can talk.”
October 29, 2013 at 5:10 am
Ooh, Would love to see a full EC post, what method you followed, how this worked with daycare, ages/transitions, if you cloth diaper etc. Maybe you’ve already done this but I searched & didn’t find it.
So sorry about your former daycare & the prepayment loss. I am usually inclined to prepay too if there is a discount. But will now think twice about that. Ouch!
And, how wonderful you have a Montessori that starts at 18 mos – all of the ones here are ~3 (must be potty trained)! Dc2 sounds like a firecracker!
October 29, 2013 at 5:49 am
The full ec post is called adventures in elimination communication. I have now populated the potty tag so you should be able to click on that. I would link but it is hard with the ipad.
October 29, 2013 at 7:18 am
It’s actually a combined Montessori/Discovery classroom (just like the place that went out of business, and in fact, has an identical school handbook, curriculum etc., as well as at least one of our favorite teachers from when DC1 was at the old Montessori).
DC2 is indeed a firecracker.
October 29, 2013 at 7:47 am
My 28-month-old (currently being potty trained), opened the linen closet door and peed in a basket that was holding toilet paper. Then she clapped. I could only watch helpless since I was in the bathtub and wasn’t able to get out quick enough to intervene!
I think its great that your 15-month-old is even remotely interested in potty training. Our first child potty trained pretty quick but child #2 is moving slow. I’m ready to be done with diapers once and for all!
October 29, 2013 at 8:15 am
I am a full believer in EC. It gets easier the earlier we start. (N=2, but DC2 started super early and DC1 started before the terrible 2s but after being diaper-trained.) If we ever have a third kid, I’m totally starting from birth.
I love the clapping. Ours will also point and babble proudly. (Ze also points and babbles angrily when DC1 thwarts her will. I hope ze never gets in trouble for tattling and keeps on pointing out injustice when ze sees it.)
October 29, 2013 at 9:05 am
Because of you guys, we are going to try to start EC from birth (with exception that if the kid comes early like it keeps trying to and needs to be in the hospital a little…well that’s not up to us.) Husband is on board. My parents are less convinced, but in a “yeah if that’s what you want to try, I guess” way.
October 29, 2013 at 10:38 am
We have been doing a relaxed method of part-time EC. It’s actually much easier than doing either f/t EC or f/t diapers. We do whatever is easiest at the time.
October 29, 2013 at 9:06 am
“THIS room”–what nonsense. I’d be asking where the magic room is to place my kid. I think as long as you keep a nerf gun in DC2’s hands, zie will survive childhood just fine.
October 29, 2013 at 9:11 am
My boyfriend thought the first story was pretty amusing. (I read it out to him as I was laughing pretty hard.)
I’m sorry about the old daycare, especially to hear that DC2 doesn’t like the new one :(
I laughed pretty hard at the nerf gun story too…
October 29, 2013 at 9:41 am
EC: I never knew there was a technical term for this before today. The next time one of my buddies at the bar is all like, “Duuude, I gotta f*cken whiz!”, I’m gonna clap and give her a gold star.
October 29, 2013 at 10:37 am
Well, the gold star is not in the EC philosophy– the don’t want the child to be pottying for you, but for hirself. So not so much with the praise or rewards. Standard potty training does often have rewards charts and starts and stuff.
October 29, 2013 at 11:05 am
You know, you can hire people to decorate your house for Christmas, you can hire people to stand in line for the newest Apple gadget, you can pay people for night nursing help, why isn’t there a service for potty training? I would gladly pay someone to come to my house for months just help potty train….
October 29, 2013 at 11:07 am
I think you can– I remember three-day potty training was really popular a few years back and you can go to clinics and stuff for that.
October 29, 2013 at 3:22 pm
:-D The potty-training enterprise idea…I love it! If someone like that is out there today, oohhhh how I wish they were there when my son was little!
What kind of diaper are you using? Have you thought of changing brands? Could be something in the product that’s irritating the kid’s tush.
Or, if you’re using cloth diapers, for hevvinsake do try paper, moral trepidations aside. M’Hijito developed the most horrific diaper rash from cloth diapers — possibly from whatever cleaning product the service was using, but whatever the cause, it was so bad I actually was willing to let him run around nekkid like Mowgli in the jungle. Better to clean up the floor than to see him suffering with actual burns all over his butt and genitals. As soon as we overcame our scruples and put him into disposable diapers, the rash went away.
October 29, 2013 at 3:35 pm
We switched from Target to Pampers, which is more absorbent (and 2x as expensive), a long time ago (when ze first started daycare as opposed to having a mother’s helper at hir beck and call) and we also use cloth at home (and we launder them ourselves). We’ve also experimented with various brands of “natural” diapers. It really isn’t the diaper, it’s the actual poo. We change hir diaper quickly enough after a poo that there’s no time for real irritation, but when ze has too long a contact with hir poo, like at daycare, it can get really bad. Essentially ze gets diaper rash at daycare and then it clears up at home. (And after getting sent home on Friday it was so bad that ze was half naked all weekend.)
Right now we’re back to a wheat-free diet in the hope that hir poo will be less irritating, because ze did have pizza for dinner Thursday night. But we’ll see. It can’t just be wheat because ze still got diaper rash from poo when ze was wheat free, but not as bad as last Friday.
I imagine that’s one reason that DC2 is so eager to potty train– DC1 didn’t care if hir diaper was wet or dirty.
October 29, 2013 at 3:29 pm
Face it, DC2 is basically a superhero. Get hir a cape, and ze will be a nerf gun wielding injustice pointing out machine!
October 29, 2013 at 3:36 pm
October 30, 2013 at 11:03 am
*sigh* Daycare says they’re going to start calling us to pick DC2 up if ze bites again. Which ze does because there are 12 kids for 2 teachers and they don’t supervise the kids when they’re cleaning up after activities and lunch and (s)he gets bored and crowded. (At the old daycare, they had an 8/2 ratio, floaters, and kids participated in cleaning up activities so the kids were never left crowded or unsupervised.)
October 30, 2013 at 11:31 am
12:2 ratio for <2 year olds? Hmmm. My boy#2 bit a few times around 18-20 months. They never made a big deal of it to us, other than giving us some tips on stopping biting/hitting at home. How is you picking the kid up (when ze likely is very happy to go home) going to do anything other than reinforce the behavior (I bite and I get to go home right away with mommy!)
October 30, 2013 at 4:39 pm
Inorite? Current plan is for dh to spend a morning or two there to see what is happening. Also he had some discussion with them re pacifier use at the critical times–we had provided an extra they weren’t using. Also they didn’t know ze has been teething (top molar currently breaking through, 3or so new teeth in the past 20days.
October 30, 2013 at 11:15 am
Another possibility (you know your child and situation better so ignore as necessary, etc, etc) – our child had horrible diaper rashes with poo because of sensitivity to the diaper wipes that exacerbated the poo irritation! Just something I hadn’t thought of until it happened to us. Two things tipped us off – massive battles to wipe (that we just thought was stubbornness because of past horrible rashes), then realizing that the bottom would start out poop-covered but normal colored, and end up bright red when we wiped. We had already been using sensitive skin wipes, so we switched to the 7th gen (far too expensive) wipes, and had no more rashes. Ever. It was bliss.
October 30, 2013 at 11:19 am
We thought about that too– but we’ve experimented with different wipes including cloth with water… it really seems to be a poo contact thing (the rash is there prior to wiping too).
We did, however, order a big box of lansinoh wipes for daycare use, just in case the wipes are exacerbating it since that’s what worked best with DC1.
October 30, 2013 at 11:35 am
Glad you thought of it! Wish we had, about 6 months before we did… Good luck with changing diet! Diaper rashes and teething are two of those things that just make me wince in sympathy.
(And a comment of support in regards to the 11:03 comment – DC2 is 15 mo. And just switched caretakers. Of course you’re going to have sporadic biting problems – it is an age-typical response to disruption. Isn’t helping to channel that to other behavior part of what teachers are supposed to do??? This gives me so much sympathy for your points 4 and 5…)
October 30, 2013 at 4:53 pm
It is. It is not the best daycare. Not terrible, but we really got spoiled the other place. Cannot wait to be old enough to switch.
February 12, 2014 at 1:31 am
[…] DC2 is loving hir new daycare. That last week when we were transitioning, ze would not want to leave the new place to go to the old place and ze would scream when we left hir at the old place. Ze is all like, “buh bye” at the new place. It’s just like it was back before our first daycare went out of business. Whew. […]