DH just got back from his second business week-long trip this month. It was an important trip and really clarified some things for both of us. I was considering turning this into my annual anniversary post, but I’ve already written one with a little bit more me-centered-ness.
When he was trying to figure out what he wanted in a job, he realized he wanted to work in teams. He wanted regular feedback. He wanted to feel as if he was doing something productive and valuable that would really help people. He wants to feel valued. He wanted to do programming but not just programming.
With his new job that he’s been working at for well over a year, he works on teams. He gets regular (weekly) feedback. He’s producing something valuable that will be literally saving lives within the next two years, should all go well. (Engineering ROCKS.) He’s doing computer programming, but not just programming, and he’s managing a project and a programmer. He’s written as many successful grants in the past year than he did during his entire time as a professor. Telecommuting and a bigger salary also haven’t hurt.
DH is happier than he has ever been before. And I’m so very proud of him. He is truly amazing. Talking to him on the phone after a particularly successful meeting I felt my uterus twinge and had to remind it that I have already reproduced (twice) with this amazing man.
I feel a little bit guilty that he wasted all those years teaching undergraduates who didn’t realize the value they were squandering by not paying attention to their studies. Truly we should have been less risk-averse and maybe he should have left academia earlier. But things have worked out. Being able to live together has definitely been a bonus and it isn’t clear that he would have been able to find such a great job 10 years ago. Spouses of some of my colleagues haven’t been so lucky and either house-husband or live apart. It’s hard to say what the counterfactual would have been.
Academia is still working well for me, but leaving academia is working extremely well for DH. We are truly blessed.