I encouraged my (heterosexual male) partner to have dinner with another woman

… even though we’re planning a wedding!

How’s that for a click-bait headline?  Clickkkk baaaaaiiiiiit.

Seriously though, this is another post on the importance of networking.

My partner’s company was imploding and it was time to get out.  So he tapped a network, went out to dinner, and came back with a referral to a new job that included a raise, a better commute, and three weeks off for the wedding and honeymoon.

Wooo networks!

(And boo patriarchy for allowing the headline of this post to sound even the least bit interesting.)

13 Responses to “I encouraged my (heterosexual male) partner to have dinner with another woman”

  1. hollyatclubthrifty Says:

    I think that’s great. It shows you are confident in your relationship!

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      … or that professional women are looking for a man (or woman) as an employee/colleague rather than as anything else…
      Terrible Hollywood movies notwithstanding.

  2. First Gen American Says:

    Since I’m an engineer, I spend most of my time with other men and it’s not weird at all.

    I guess on the plus side, your heading wasn’t shocking to me. Hurray.

  3. Rented life Says:

    Yay! Congrats to partner!

  4. xykademiqz Says:

    N&M, I foresee a career at Buzzfeed for you — you are a natural!
    And congrats on the impending nuptials!

  5. SP Says:

    woooo, congrats to your partner on the new gig!

    Sounds like it was well worth the risk of allowing your partner to meet unsupervised with a competitor. ;)

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      If she weren’t a (business) competitor, then the job offer probably wouldn’t have come so quickly! (In that the network would have had to branch out a few more times before resulting in a job referral.)

  6. Thisbe Says:

    I feel faintly nauseated by the idea of *not* encouraging a partner to go out to dinner with another person if that was what the partner wanted to do. Like…what would be the point of that?

    (Full disclosure, I am probably twice as likely as my partner to go out for the evening with a single someone else. The partner is a little more likely to go out with a group of people that doesn’t include me. We are pretty much off the chart in the “completely monogamous” direction, I’m not talking open relationship here, just the general idea that we don’t own one another’s time and that if one of us is busy or disinclined, the other should still feel free to do something fun.)

    Because of the above parenthetical, I’m not even sure the problem is exactly the patriarchy so much as it is the idea that there is only room for one fun and positive relationship in one’s life at a time.

    All that said, it is generally recognized that my relationship is not very normal, so maybe I shouldn’t really say anything.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      I dunno, that seems pretty normal to me.

    • First Gen American Says:

      I remember people being worried about my marriage because we took separate vacations to different places one year. that was 10 years ago. I think the space and freedom helps relationship longevity. At least it is with my case.

  7. Revanche Says:

    Hah. Read the headline and thought: the only thing unusual about that is that it’s phrased as though it were unusual. I guess it is for all Those Other People who cannot trust their husbands with other women, or their own children, or to make their own decisions or dinners or pick their own clothes.

    But YAY for the referral cuz how awesome is that?!


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