link love

This week in misogyny.  And related.

This week in racism.  Some black humor.  And more f- the police.

Guess who the only person being punished for the CIA torture report is.

Twitter’s new troll stick.  How Enron Gjoni started Gamergate.

If men were asked the questions women are asked.

Cause of sleepless nights.

I was trying to figure out if we needed shelf liners in the master bathroom (because some came with the house and then the kittens destroyed them).  I found a world out there that I did not know people had time for.  Because I guess it matters to some folks which roll goes in which room?  (closeup)

Congratulations Dr. Nessie Monster!

It was never a dress.

Is this really satire?  Asks the one fostering kittens…

Important longitudinal study.


History of hairstyles!

New tiny kittens!

Ask the grumpies: What kind of mp3 player should I get?

Rented life asks:

I need to buy an MP3 player (not iPod). What do I get?

Because my DH has recently gone through the mp3 player replacement process, I have asked him.

He settled on a SanDisk Sansa Clip. Why? Because it is small, it is ~$60, and it had relatively good reviews on amazon. More expensive mp3 players had somewhat higher reviews, but not high enough to make the price difference worth it, he felt. They still had problems.

It’s great for audiobooks. If you’re an audiophile, he says it’s probably not high enough quality to get the nuances of the music you’re listening to.  He says it will play the higher quality formats but not well.  But if you’re more of a box wine drinker with your music tastes, you should be fine.

He says this is a satisficing sort of quest. If you’re looking for something cheaper, then maybe this, though the reviews are a little odd so maybe not.

DH also wants to recommend these ear foam tips for putting over your ear buds.  He says they’re totally worth the price even though they wear out every six months or so.  They block more outside noise and they seem to make the sound coming from the mp3 player clearer than other earbud tips he has tried.  But, he notes, you have to get the right size, so get the multi-pack first to determine the right size.

That’s all we got. Grumpy Nation, what’s your favorite mp3 player and why? What hasn’t worked for you?

Making friends as a professor or as an adult

One of the problems with being a young untenured sort of person is that, outside of your department, the majority of people you meet your age are graduate students.  Graduate students have this unfortunate tendency to graduate and LEAVE.

You can be friends with colleagues, but you can’t tell them too much before tenure.  And sometimes if you get too close you realize they’re not only crazy but you have to work with them for potentially the next SIXTY YEARS.  So a little distance with most of them can be nice.

If you have kids, you will end up socializing a lot with parents of other kids, but a lot of times even though your kids may be able to discuss Minecraft for hours, you actually have little to nothing in common with them.  Of course, if you’re not extroverted, then having kids and kids having activities uses up all your people time and you’re just kind of stuck not really wanting to talk to anybody else.  (Hopefully you enjoy spending time with your family!)

If you live in a thriving metropolis, you can meet people with your interests online or through meet-ups.  Even in smaller towns you can be active in interest groups.  Maybe politics.  Maybe school board.  Maybe board-games.  If your hobbies and interests go more in the direction of watching bad tv and reading novels, that’s not going to work so well.  (Recall that book clubs seem like *work* to many academics.)

In the end, after my new friends left and graduated, and I found the right amount of closeness/distance with colleagues, and I split children’s activities with DH, most of my new friends are conference buddies.  I see and socialize with people I like and enjoy talking with (small-talk even!) a few times a year.  Sometimes we email in between, sometimes we don’t.  Sometimes we miss each other for a year or two or three, sometimes we see each other several months in a row.  Sometimes we make time to have meals, sometimes we just chat at 10 min breaks.  It’s odd having closer friends that I travel and see than I have in my own home town, but I bet I’m not alone in this.

Have you made friends as an adult?  How have you gone about it?  Do you wish you had more or are you happy with what you have?

Angry Robot Army?

I dunno, man, it sounds kinda militaristic.  But yet!  AR Books!  So on-point!

Angry Robot Books publishes an extremely good-ass library of books. They have one of the highest hit-rates for me of books they publish that I read and own.  (#2 not so much.  #2 craves light and fluffy.  #2 does like Matthew Hughes though.  But he’s the only author on their list she is both familiar with and enjoys reading.  There’s no denying that, for example, Lauren Beukes is quality, but bad things happen to people in her books.)

They also publicize in areas that I see, and that helps.  Their ebooks are DRM-free.

The unusual thing for me is that I very rarely pay attention to which publishers are putting out which books.  Authors, yes; publishers, almost never (sometimes if it’s Subterranean Press).

I seem to be squarely in Angry Robot’s target audience, and they seem to be reaching me pretty well.

I like their books but I wish there weren’t an “army”.

Books of theirs that we have liked and/or found interesting and/or have read and/or own:

And more are on my wish-list, too!

There was a brief panic that a 2 of their imprints (which I’ve never heard of) are closing, but not the whole press.  Honestly I didn’t know they HAD imprints until I saw that post.  Their press release said, “The core Angry Robot imprint is robust, however, and we plan to increase our output from 2 books a month, to 3.”

So… yeah?  Keep rockin!


Grumpeteers, have you read any Angry Robot books?

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Two years after leaving academia: DH is flourishing

DH just got back from his second business week-long trip this month.  It was an important trip and really clarified some things for both of us.  I was considering turning this into my annual anniversary post, but I’ve already written one with a little bit more me-centered-ness.


When he was trying to figure out what he wanted in a job, he realized he wanted to work in teams.  He wanted regular feedback.  He wanted to feel as if he was doing something productive and valuable that would really help people.  He wants to feel valued.  He wanted to do programming but not just programming.

With his new job that he’s been working at for well over a year, he works on teams.  He gets regular (weekly) feedback.  He’s producing something valuable that will be literally saving lives within the next two years, should all go well.  (Engineering ROCKS.)  He’s doing computer programming, but not just programming, and he’s managing a project and a programmer.  He’s written as many successful grants in the past year than he did during his entire time as a professor.  Telecommuting and a bigger salary also haven’t hurt.

DH is happier than he has ever been before.  And I’m so very proud of him.  He is truly amazing.  Talking to him on the phone after a particularly successful meeting I felt my uterus twinge and had to remind it that I have already reproduced (twice) with this amazing man.

I feel a little bit guilty that he wasted all those years teaching undergraduates who didn’t realize the value they were squandering by not paying attention to their studies.  Truly we should have been less risk-averse and maybe he should have left academia earlier.  But things have worked out.  Being able to live together has definitely been a bonus and it isn’t clear that he would have been able to find such a great job 10 years ago.  Spouses of some of my colleagues haven’t been so lucky and either house-husband or live apart.  It’s hard to say what the counterfactual would have been.

Academia is still working well for me, but leaving academia is working extremely well for DH.  We are truly blessed.

Link love for squirrelly April

April makes people in academia lose their brains for busyness.  In this week’s Fc*k the police…

black lives matter - stats

Black cyclists in trouble with the po-po.

Racism interacts with sexism!  Don’t forget the black women.  Black women’s lives matter.

wow (on point)

Myths about women in science.  @femfreq is pretty cool!

Adam Sandler is racist.

Scalzi being tasty-delicious.

Tiny elephant tries to find the rest of a human’s nose.

gamergate is still a thing (aka, what was that whole anne wheaton thing about)

Are you receiving a marriage penalty or bonus?

Dr. Cleveland carefully takes apart the argument that colleges no longer teach Shakespeare.

Skipping grades is ok!

History of artificial flavoring

anxiety and parenting a gifted child

wish I could have seen this

Vlogbrothers for infinite amusement:

Google questions for a very busy Friday

Q:  how can a civil engineer wife help with regarding the partner’s career?

A:  let’s back up to “why” before “how,” ok?

Q:  being a teacher what should she behave or follow

A:  probably not this:

Teachers' Contract 1923

Q:  what would authoritarian parent do if their child asked them if they can sleep over a friends house

A:  once again, do your own homework

Q:  who is accounting professor?

A:  Not us…

Q:  why are professors so grumpy

A:  Systematic undermining of our livelihood

Q:  what does it mean when someone challenges you to a brewsters millions

A:  we have No Idea.  Sorry.  That’s not true… we have a post on it, but it’s seriously unlikely that anybody is going to tell you that you get a ginormous amount of money if you’re able to spend a big amount of money in a short amount of time.  Most likely it’s a scam.

Q:  should adult kids always come first?

A:  it’s polite to help your partner out first.  Better to give than to receive and all that.

Q:  what do university lecturers do in the summer

A:  Teach summer classes.  Sleep.  Struggle to pay the bills.  Research.  Write all those papers.

Q:  why do narcissists love misery

A:  For the attention?  I dunno.

Q:  what is the average salary of a cpa with a doctorate

A:  You’re looking for this page , or else the side-bar on this one (Hint:  Pretty high)


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