When did you or your children stop believing in the literal interpretation of folk figures?

Here’s another post from 2011.  I’ve updated it!

Dean Dad’s fifth grader has questioned Santa Claus.

When did you or your children stop believing (if at all)?

I don’t remember ever literally believing in Santa Claus or the tooth fairy.  I remember always thinking about it like the Land of Make Believe on Mr. Rogers Neighborhood.  I would never be so gauche as to stop pretending (especially since that might mean the cessation of gifts/money), but always in a wink-wink-nudge-nudge sort of way.  I remember being disgusted when a fellow second grader announced to the class that Santa Claus is just your parents… duh! but you don’t SAY that out loud.  Magic isn’t real, but it’s fun to make believe.

DC[1] was just getting around to the concept of Santa last Christmas [age 3 or 4 back in 2011]… not sure how ze escaped it for so many years… possibly because Santa is overshadowed by grandparents in the gift department.  This year ze’s been reading a LOT of magic books, and we’ve had a lot of conversations about magic not being real but pretend… so I imagine this Christmas ze’ll make the connection, especially in conjunction with learning about Saint Nicholas at school.

Updates:

DC2 didn’t get the concept and then vehemently didn’t believe at age 3, and then around age 4 we moved back from paradise for a last year of preschool and was completely indoctrinated by one of the preschool teachers regarding the Easter Bunny.  I believe at some point in this age 4 range zie asked us point blank if the Easter Bunny was real or if Santa was real and we asked what zie thought instead of answering.  DC2 only had a year of religious education (age 3) so none of that connection to the Catholic/Anglican saints thing.  I think once got to kindergarten we were back at the “not real” stage.

We’ve never really told our children either way.  We don’t really talk about Santa or the Easter Bunny or the Tooth Fairy doing things, though I guess we do say “leave teeth for the tooth fairy” (DC2 response:  Daddy is the tooth fairy, and I’d rather keep my teeth).  But we also never contradicted people saying such things.  And we have been careful about making sure they know not to spoil it for other kids.

Grumpy Nation, When did you or your children (if applicable) stop believing in creatures like the Tooth Fairy et al.?

A Google Questions post (before we solicit more Ask the Grumpies next week– get your questions ready!)

Q: do u want to do phd in accounting

A:  No, not really.

Q:  is phd in education worth it than phd in accounting

A:  A PhD in accounting is worth more and harder to get.  A PhD in education is useful if you need to climb the education administration ladder (ex. being a superintendent).

Q:  y r we forced tp do things

A:  Because you don’t do them on your own!  Now pick up that wet towel off the floor!

Q:  what are the works can professor do in vacation

A:  Research, class prep… even service.

Q:  why is last mortgage payment of year higher

A:  That’s bizarre… could your escrow (insurance + tax) have gone up?

Q:  can 529 be used for graduate school nut child no longer dependant

A:  Yes.

Q:  im 18 how long will it take me to get a phd in business accounting

A:  Before or after you finish college with high grades?  Generally 4 years of college + any years of experience you want to do + 5 to 7 years of graduate school, give or take.  Good luck!

Q:  i need a nightjob to pay off debt help

A:  Sorry, that’s rough.  Craigslist?

Q:  does long unemployment hurt your job chances

A:  Yes, sorry again.  Keep trying.  I got nuthin’ here.

Q:  is it normal for a gifted child to sleep early

A:  If they’re sleepy or growing or getting a mental and/or physical workout.  It’s certainly not abnormal, even if gifted kids tend on average to need less sleep, that’s not always the case.

Ask the grumpies: If you could only sit on one piece of furniture for a year…

Leah asks:

If you could pick one of the following pieces of furniture to be the only one you sit in for a year, which would you choose? Rocking chair, chaise lounge, office chair, glider, or wingback

Given how much time I spent at the computer, it would have to be the office chair.

Is bed an option?  I like beds…

Grumpy Nation, what would you pick?

What are your love languages?

I’ve been listening to the By the Book Podcast recently, and one of their books was the 5 love languages.  So DH and I took the 5 love languages quiz online (you have to put in an email, but you can totally put in a fake email– they will still give you your results at the end in addition to emailing them to you).

Here’s our results:

Me:

10	Acts of Service
7	Physical Touch
7	Quality Time
6	Words of Affirmation
0	Receiving Gifts

DH:

9	Physical Touch
8	Quality Time
8	Words of Affirmation
5	Acts of Service
0	Receiving Gifts

I think this works out very nicely for me because it means DH can show he cares by doing stuff for me.  I just have to provide the physical touch and quality time that I also value!  Total win for me!  And, of course, words of affirmation which are super easy when he’s doing stuff that I appreciate.  It’s a great exchange.  :)

What are your love languages?

A dialogue on cephalophones

I realize these dialogues would be much more exciting if one of us could draw, or pretend to draw, on the computer.  But alas, we are lazy.

#1:  I didn’t realize there was a word for this, but it makes sense.

#2:  …and it has to be saints, not just anybody carrying their heads?

#1:  maybe it’s a term about saints that you could apply to other people?

#2:  but that might confuse people– how would they know you’re speaking metaphorically?

#1:  hmm

#2:  like you don’t want people to think that an *ordinary* group of people carrying their heads are actually saints

#1:  haha

#2:  Or worse!  It could be dangerous.  You might confuse a group of headless horsemen for saints.

#1:  only if they had horses

#2:  or British houseghosts!

#1:  (nearly)

#2:  They’re not always nearly headless!  What about the Canterbury Ghost?

#1:  What about him?

#2:  He’s not a saint.

#1:  Right.

#2:  Or what about Nearly Headless Nick’s Frenemies?  I bet they’re dangerous.  Can’t go mixing them up with saints.

#1:  hahahaha

[end]

 

 

things you don’t actually have to do (unless you want to)

As we’ve gotten old and allowed to be lazy, we’ve made some discoveries about things that we grew up thinking everybody did, or found out that other people thought everyone did (even if we didn’t)

• make your bed
• fold your underpants
• declutter
• puree baby food (they don’t actually need mush)
• cut old tshirts into same-size pieces to make rags (you can use it as rags without cutting it, you can tear where there’s already holes etc.)
• shave your “lady-bits” (embarrassingly, I didn’t even know this was a thing until I saw people talking on a mother’s forum)
• sleep train

ETA:  I’ve heard great things about Drop the Ball by Tiffany Dufu.

Grumpy Nation, what are some things you’ve realized don’t actually need to be done, or that you were surprised to find other people thought were necessary?

Ask the grumpies: emojis vs. emoticons

Leah asks:

what is your stance on emoticons, and are there ones you favor? What about emojis? I prefer emoticons, for the record, but maybe it’s because I like to kick it old school.

#1:  Gchat used to have these super cool emoticons that would move and turn around after you made them.  So the less than 3 would rotate and fill into a pink heart.  The winky face would wink at you.  And so on. (Especially the secret hidden ones like the monkey and rock on and stuff.)  Those were the best.

#2: Emojis are silly and sometimes fun. I use them sometimes for ridiculousness. I prefer emoticons like you, as I am what you might call ancient school.

Do you twirl your spaghetti?

And if you do, do you use a spoon to assist with the twirls?

What are your thoughts on cutting spaghetti noodles?  Pro/Con/Ambivalent?

#1:  I twirl but don’t use a spoon. A very small part of me cringes at the thought of cutting spaghetti noodles, but the bulk of me thinks it makes total sense.  This is somewhere around the level of split infinitives for me, maybe some other grammar thing that I don’t do in formal writing myself but don’t mind when others do it.  (I’m pretty sure I occasionally split infinitives in formal writing.)

#2:  Yes twirl, no on the spoon, I think cutting it is wrong but my dad does it (and I continually give him [excrement] for it)

Ask the grumpies: What would your political party be? What would you call it?

Leah asks:

If you created a political party of your own, what would you name it?

#1:  [My Name] Is In Charge Of Everything.

#2:  I definitely wouldn’t have my name in it.  But other than that, I’ve got nothing.  Maybe The Middle Class?  Because everybody wants to belong…

What is your favorite kind of pie?

#1:  I like apple myself.  Though I’m also a fan of pecan in moderation. (And, of course, pot pies are great.)

#2:  1.  Pumpkin, 2. French silk, 3. pie full of hammers [#1 does not know what this is], 4. Pecan-bourbon pie with chocolate chips