link love

Historiann notes more patriarchal bullshit from jealous losers.

Molvray looks at the implications of corporations as people.

We wish good luck to the What Now unit.

Donna Freedman explains why it is so important to teach your kids autonomy.  We can’t wait until DC1 is tall enough to reach the stove.

Donate to a science fiction author with cancer.  Also, from that page, “bracing” is definitely a good word to describe Mary Robinette Kowal’s reading of the classics.  Check out Moby Dick!

That baby pic that’s been on the interwebs and news.

How much more tax you’ll pay.

21 Responses to “link love”

  1. What Now? Says:

    Thanks for the good wishes!

  2. Historiann Says:

    Thanks for the link!

    Hope you’re having a good weekend.

  3. Comradde PhysioProffe Says:

    I call shenanigans on the characterization at that link of the baby “reaching out and holding” the doctor’s finger. The baby’s arm obviously flopped out of the incision and the doctor either intentionally placed her finger In the hand or, more likely, it inadvertently ended up there during the procedure.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      it is still cute

      • Comradde PhysioProffe Says:

        I consider it pernicious, as it grossly overstates the extent to which a baby at the time of birth has the neural capacity to form an intention and perform an action, and thereby plays into the evil schemes of extremist anti-abortion activists who prey on people’s misconceptions of fetal neural capacity. I would be willing to bet huge amounts of money that this photograph and its misconstrual is being breathlessly passed around by extremist anti-abortion activists as suiting their nefarious purposes.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        Um… at the time of birth a baby is able to live outside the womb. At that point it is infanticide and not abortion because the baby no longer needs the mother to survive. Also, my babies had that finger grabbing reflex very shortly after birth. It’s a c-section to get the baby out, not some sort of in-utero surgery on a fetus.

      • Comradde PhysioProffe Says:

        I understand all that, and I am obviously not in favor of infanticide. The point is that this kind of gross overstatement of the capacities of babies at the time of birth serves the ends of those who seek to push back the time at which fetuses are considered “people”.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        If you will recall, birth is the point at which most pro-life people stop caring.

      • Comradde PhysioProffe Says:

        Maybe I am not explaining myself clearly, but the point is that by making just-about-to-be-born babies appear like they have much greater neural capacities than they do, anti-abortion extremists lend support to their claims that fetuses at earlier stages also have much greater neural capacities than they do at those stages.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        I dunno, newborn babies just out of the uterus can both crawl and suckle. The hand holding is also a reflex, so I’m not actually buying they can’t do it, especially since mine could right after said crawling and suckling. (It is my favorite baby trick, so I do it right off. DH likes the reflex walking best.)

  4. becca Says:

    Turns out, 3.5 is too young to use the stove lightly supervised. *sigh* This is why parents like me should not read articles like the one Donna was referencing.

    Also, in a technical sense, it could be argued that is (an adorable) baby’s hand on a fetus. Because it’s a “fetus” until birth, which requires leaving the uterus. Of course, that reasoning allows for the formal possibility of people who were NEVER born, because while extremely rare, extra-uterine (abdominal) viable pregnancies have occurred. Someday, we shall figure out how to do this intentionally, and safely, and men will carry fetuses. At which time, we will all be able to collectively say “what an adorable baby hand” AND “that person’s rights are subordinate to the rights of the person whose abdomen zie is in”.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      We started with laundry, which is relatively safe for the kid, at least if you have front loaders. At 6 ze still can’t use the stove, though I’ve been talking hir through making simple dishes like scrambled eggs with hir watching. (Over Christmas, DC1 explained to hir grandpa that we use water instead of milk.) My parents started me on the more dangerous stuff around age 7, so that’s probably when DC1 will start as well.

      Also: looked to me like the hand had left the uterus.

  5. bogart Says:

    I was, in fact, wondering when yours would start using the stove, but I see that’s been addressed. Mine helps, semi-at-his-insistence, with the making of popcorn, which is, after all, pretty interesting. This has led, though, to one (very mild) arm burn, caused by a mom (that would be me) bumping kid with a hot pot after removing same from stove. I of course felt horrid (and am tremendously relieved it was just a mild bump and thus burn), it was one of those moments when one is tired and hurried and … . Not good. (But I do also recognize that there was some educational advantage to it (again, given the very mild outcome, basically a slight pink patch) as I had forever and ever and ever told DS he MUST be careful if he stood near the stove once things got hot (he enjoys helping put the popcorn in, which obviously happens prior to that point), a caution he of course took far more seriously …)

    Mine makes banana bread, which works really well for us. Obviously I handle the baking part, but he takes elaborate care in blending (and tasting) the ingredients, which can easily provide me with a virtually free 30 minutes in the kitchen to do other stuff (with the occasional interruption, of course).

    Donna’s article lost me in two places though. One was the commenters, where roughly half seem convinced that an inability to do laundry as a young adult is caused by the parents’ failure to use corporal punishment. But the other actually was that laundry example; of course I agree that college-aged kids should have been taught how to do laundry (though, haha, I type that as someone who herself many would describe as not knowing how to do laundry, since I don’t separate colors and throw everything together on either cold or warm. And use only detergent! So primitive…). But the real failing in that case seemed to me to be not the laundry but the apparent inability to cope: far more than how to do laundry, I think I should teach my kid that if he gets to XXXXXXXXXX and doesn’t know how to YYYYYYYYYY, he should, well, do any number of things, that might include depending on the circumstances (a) phoning home (b) googling (c) asking a nearby person for assistance (d) trying SOMETHING and seeing what the result is. How to problem solve is a much more useful skill than how to do laundry (and a rarer one, I believe.

    • nicoleandmaggie Says:

      DC1 has been helping in the kitchen for a really long time (before age 2?) but not the stove yet. I got various burns starting around age 9. They didn’t really phase me (though I’m sure I cried a lot at the time).

      Laundry and corporal punishment? Bizarre… I don’t think I saw those comments. I taught many people how to do laundry in college (hint: there are instructions on both the washers and on the soap!), but my first roommate in high school gave me a quick tutorial. My mom was finicky about laundry and didn’t let me help until I was 16 or so, even though I was doing the ironing starting age 7. (I did help separate before and fold after.)

      Since having kids, I no longer separate the laundry and only buy color-safe fabrics (also after DH married me he had to stop using fabric softener because it makes me itch). I think growing up it was harder to get colorsafe stuff. DH had pink socks (and, I believe, but could not possibly know) underpants for much of high school.

      Weirdly, my sister grew up without all those life skills my parents instilled in me. So I still get the occasional phone call from her asking how to do X Y or Z, even with google available.

      • bogart Says:

        I exaggerate slightly (the link isn’t directly between corporal punishment and laundry and it’s not really 50%, but neither is it 1%), but, e.g., “Young children should also be paddled when necessary. I was, when I did something wrong, and I learned to obey my parents, which is a precursor to learning to accept authority” (in digging around for an example comment I also found this one: “The author of this article is dead right…we’re raising our children to be narcissistic, helpless spoiled brats. In other words, we’re raising them to be lifelong Democrat voters.”)

        What is this ironing you mention ;) ?

        You’re probably right about color-safeness, and my propensity to thrift shop coupled with DH’s retired (and previously, IT) status probably simplify matters as he is a shorts + polo shirt guy (heck, dressy: his shirts have collars with buttons!).

        I didn’t learn (really) to cook until college (if ever, again, perhaps debatable), but by junior high I was certainly capable of preparing myself a meal, even if that did mean making a sandwich or opening a can of something. I haven’t really started calling on DS to help in a meaningful way yet, but he certainly helps with some aspects of food prep and cleanup.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        How timely– we have an unfinished post in the queue on authoritative vs authoritarian parenting. You can probably guess which kind we are. It ends, however, with the irony that the kids we know with authoritarian parents are total rebels and our oldest is a total rules follower. When you have a reason to trust and understand the rules, you’re more likely to follow them!

        Ironing is something that my father required but refused to do himself, as it was woman’s work. We do not iron in our current household.

        My DH didn’t learn to cook until we married, pretty much. But he’s a better cook than I am now!

      • bogart Says:

        Sounds good. Are the rebel kids the same age as yours, or older (or younger, I suppose)? Rule-following seems pretty common with the elementary school set. Mine’s a rule-follower also.

        My family of origin had somewhat similar approaches to ironing, though my mother largely rejected them. My SIL *enjoys* ironing, oddly enough. We do own an iron in my household, but I don’t know when we last used it. Of course even our “dress” clothes lend themselves toward staying wrinkle free.

      • nicoleandmaggie Says:

        We live in a red rural state. Rebel kids with authoritarian parents come in all ages.

    • bogart Says:

      Ah, right. My immediate area is blue, even if it’s surrounded by a sea of red. Imagine my astonishment (and dismay) when I saw not one but two Romney/Ryan yard signs in my very town this fall (there were plenty in the surrounding counties, and a majority as reflected by vote choice in the state as a whole).

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